Angry!

I'm so pissed off right now. It's 'period' time, so I'm a little more hormonal than usual anyway, which I fully acknowledge. I'm definately swinging between tearing up, and feeling rage.

I haven't worked out at the gym on a Sunday for months, but I went this morning, and man, it felt good to work some of the frustration out! When I went past B's street on the way, at 11am, his work car was out front, so I dont think he did work today after all. Afterward, I went to the shopping centre (where I go often, and where I saw B's wife once) to get a couple of things, but also on the lookout for B or his family. I wanted to say something. Once and for all. Finish things properly. Get everything out in the open. Make it so I can move on. Didn't see anyone.

This is so ridiculous to be so caught up over someone. But I am in such pain. I've never felt it like this. My house is immaculate and chores are up to date; because when Im angry, I work. I suppose that's a good thing... And keeping busy helps keep me from doing anything stupid that I might regret, like send him a whingey bitchy text, or call his house. Or something.

I have been saying to myself over and over to not contact him again in any shape or form. Fuck him.

And I dont think I can be fucked about anyone else either, ever again.