Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Ummed and ahhed about sending B a message today; something general like "this weather is gorgeous!" or "hope your Tuesday is fab" or something equally cheesy and girly. ;-) I did not send one however due to that very fact, and was glad I didn't, because he sent me one at 11.00am explaining how he didn't have his phone on him on Sunday night and therefore did not get my original text (about meeting me at the ATM) until yesterday. Id also sent a message a little while after Id returned home thanking him for the drink, to which he replied "my pleasure" and said have a great day. "You too." I replied.
So, I think we're okay. I was worried that... I dunno, like perhaps he'd want to end things after my clingy attack. lol.
So, I think we're okay. I was worried that... I dunno, like perhaps he'd want to end things after my clingy attack. lol.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
I was supposed to meet someone this morning from a dating site that Ive been talking with, but that didn't happen due to miscommunication... to say I was annoyed is an understatement!
And of course all day I thought about B, wondering when he'd finished work, if he'd message me, blah blah blah.
My daughters and I went out for dinner with some family, and as soon as we returned home, I put my mouth back on, and told them (my daughters) I'd be back in an hour. I went to the pub where I knew B would be.
He was in his usual spot, and I stood where I could see him, but because I didn't know who he was there with I couldn't stand in full view. I sent him a text basically saying hi and to come meet me. I waited and watched a while to see if he looked at his phone. After ten or 15 minutes, I realised Id have to do something else. I noticed one of his friends was a guy Id met out with him a few weeks back, so I stood where I knew he'd see me and then he'd get B's attention for me.
That worked.
B looked over, and smiled, and gave a bit of a nod in acknowledgment. I nodded back and then walked just out of view, thinking that he would come over. Silly me! I waited and waited. I'm thinking what the?? So I walked back in to view, he saw me, and I motioned for him to come to me.
He greeted me with a kiss on the cheek, and asked why I didn't go over (to their group) and I replied I didn't know who he was there with so how could I? He asked why I didn't reply to his text message from the night before, and was I pissed off or something? and I replied that I hadn't wanted to sound whiny or nagging so I didn't reply. I said it wasn't about "Saturday night" but more about the fact I hadn't heard from him all week. He did this shrug and facial expression that said "well, what can I do?". "Anyway," I said, "thats why I'm here. Instead of replying to that text".
Anyway, after a bit of chit chat, he invited me over to the group, and he bought me a cab sav. Two guys from work were there as well as the female friend of one Id met the other Thursday night, and her best friend who is also one of the guys house mate, who - small world indeed - lives next door to one of my good friends!
I stayed for about 30 minutes. We talked about Bali, and other bits and pieces and he commented on how good I looked (awww). B did say "stay" (longer) but Id already told my daughters Id be home at a certain time. I said goodbye to everyone, and sashayed my way out.
And of course all day I thought about B, wondering when he'd finished work, if he'd message me, blah blah blah.
My daughters and I went out for dinner with some family, and as soon as we returned home, I put my mouth back on, and told them (my daughters) I'd be back in an hour. I went to the pub where I knew B would be.
He was in his usual spot, and I stood where I could see him, but because I didn't know who he was there with I couldn't stand in full view. I sent him a text basically saying hi and to come meet me. I waited and watched a while to see if he looked at his phone. After ten or 15 minutes, I realised Id have to do something else. I noticed one of his friends was a guy Id met out with him a few weeks back, so I stood where I knew he'd see me and then he'd get B's attention for me.
That worked.
B looked over, and smiled, and gave a bit of a nod in acknowledgment. I nodded back and then walked just out of view, thinking that he would come over. Silly me! I waited and waited. I'm thinking what the?? So I walked back in to view, he saw me, and I motioned for him to come to me.
He greeted me with a kiss on the cheek, and asked why I didn't go over (to their group) and I replied I didn't know who he was there with so how could I? He asked why I didn't reply to his text message from the night before, and was I pissed off or something? and I replied that I hadn't wanted to sound whiny or nagging so I didn't reply. I said it wasn't about "Saturday night" but more about the fact I hadn't heard from him all week. He did this shrug and facial expression that said "well, what can I do?". "Anyway," I said, "thats why I'm here. Instead of replying to that text".
Anyway, after a bit of chit chat, he invited me over to the group, and he bought me a cab sav. Two guys from work were there as well as the female friend of one Id met the other Thursday night, and her best friend who is also one of the guys house mate, who - small world indeed - lives next door to one of my good friends!
I stayed for about 30 minutes. We talked about Bali, and other bits and pieces and he commented on how good I looked (awww). B did say "stay" (longer) but Id already told my daughters Id be home at a certain time. I said goodbye to everyone, and sashayed my way out.
You know how B works one Sunday morning every 4 or 5 weeks? Well I had a feeling it may fall this weekend... I went out with some friends last night to a concert by an old time Aussie singer. It was an impromptu invite, but I'm glad I went; we had a good time.
Around 7.40 B sent me a text saying "Hi Sexy" (he hasn't used any endearments in a while), asked how I was, and also let me he couldn't call in. He said "talk soon" and finished with "xxx" which he has never done with me before. I was so pissed off, upset and confused all at once. I actually shed a couple of tears! Pissed off that I hadn't heard from him all week, upset I wouldn't get to see him (but really I'm more pissed off at not hearing from him), and confused about his use of kisses. What the? Is he trying to sugar coat things? I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to sound whiny, or complain, or clingy or upset. And I didn't want to say that it was "okay" either. So, I didn't reply at all. So not like me.
I dropped a daughter off to the movies this morning and did a drive past his house on the way back and the work van wasn't there, but that doesn't really mean anything. And I think he has a day off tomorrow too, so who knows when or if Ill hear from him.
Fucker.
Around 7.40 B sent me a text saying "Hi Sexy" (he hasn't used any endearments in a while), asked how I was, and also let me he couldn't call in. He said "talk soon" and finished with "xxx" which he has never done with me before. I was so pissed off, upset and confused all at once. I actually shed a couple of tears! Pissed off that I hadn't heard from him all week, upset I wouldn't get to see him (but really I'm more pissed off at not hearing from him), and confused about his use of kisses. What the? Is he trying to sugar coat things? I didn't know what to say. I didn't want to sound whiny, or complain, or clingy or upset. And I didn't want to say that it was "okay" either. So, I didn't reply at all. So not like me.
I dropped a daughter off to the movies this morning and did a drive past his house on the way back and the work van wasn't there, but that doesn't really mean anything. And I think he has a day off tomorrow too, so who knows when or if Ill hear from him.
Fucker.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Here it is, 9.12pm Friday night, and I haven't heard from B since Monday... and even then it was only briefly. I sent him a text asking out of all the little things Id worn for him was there any he'd liked the best and he replied "they're all good". I replied that he was a bugger and that that answer was too general.
And nothing else since.
I thought I may have heard from him last night, if he'd gone to see the band at the pub, or at least tonight inviting me for drinks... but nope. So tomorrow, if he messages me, I should suggest he brings his money and start paying me since he's using me like a hooker.
He is so unpredictable! How is okay to have lots of contact one week, and barely anything the next?
I joined up with 2 online dating sites during the week... short version of that is that Im meeting up with a gorgeous guy on Sunday... will be interesting anyhow. More on that some other 60 seconds.
And nothing else since.
I thought I may have heard from him last night, if he'd gone to see the band at the pub, or at least tonight inviting me for drinks... but nope. So tomorrow, if he messages me, I should suggest he brings his money and start paying me since he's using me like a hooker.
He is so unpredictable! How is okay to have lots of contact one week, and barely anything the next?
I joined up with 2 online dating sites during the week... short version of that is that Im meeting up with a gorgeous guy on Sunday... will be interesting anyhow. More on that some other 60 seconds.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
I received a text from B around 8.30 Saturday night asking if he was seeing me later. Later, around 11.40pm - half an hour earlier than usual - I received another message asking "now?". i had 2 of my older daughters home and we'd only just finished watching a movie, so I was a bit surprised. "10 minutes!" I texted back...
Our "relationship" - Ill have to think of another word - has shifted slightly. It's a little more relaxed, or something. A bit like, for me at least, I'm confident now that I am his "other" woman and neither of us are finishing with each other any time soon.
I still feel a little self conscious at times though. A little shy. I don't think that's a bad thing. Its better than being too cocky and coming off brash. When he arrived I directed him straight to my bedroom, and went back and got him a drink of water that he wanted. He sat on my bed and drank it. "You finished?" I asked him with a bit of a laugh. "'Cause now I can kiss you!" I said and pushed him back on the bed.
The yummiest yummiest kisses!
I was dressed in my black chenille 3/4 dressing gown with nice lingerie... I undressed him, starting with his boots. He made this noise when I went to take his socks off, and I told him girls prefer the socks off! :-)
For the first time, there were a number of times, when he almost came quite early. But he made me stop, or be still, or let go of his balls. And Id pout, or say no, and then I started saying I wanted him to give it to me. "That makes a change, doesn't it?" he asked and I smiled.
"This feels so good he said". We looked at each other a lot this time... and he said "Its been a while." "6 weeks," I replied. "But who's counting?" We chuckled.
After a while though, it seemed things were going the other way... We tried a few different positions, and once, when I was on top, he said "we'll have to try something else." "Like what?" I asked. "What do you want" and he put his fingers on my mouth and said "Like last time." He wanted me to give him a head job. After a few minutes I went down on him, but I have to say this area of things is rather frustrating. Giving head, at least with my previous partner of 9 years, has never been a problem. But I know B likes it fast, and I told him I couldn't be that fast with my mouth. I came back up to ride him again, and kiss him. I asked him if he minded kissing after Id been down on him and he said not at all. Which I like.
He had me doggy style and after a couple of minutes he asked if I wanted to "finish" him. "Yes!" I said, and so he withdrew out of me and turned me around and I blew him with my mouth. I love when he comes; he felt hot and big in my mouth, tasted fantastic (the best Ive tasted), but most of all I like the noises he makes.
We laid for a few minutes but it actually felt odd. I'm used to him dressing or showering straight away.
As he was leaving, and we were kissing and cuddling, he said he wished he could stay. I wished he wouldn't say that, because that will never happen, but I just nodded and held on tighter.
I told him that next week there would be just him and me (ie: no kids) and that maybe he could make some noise. Then I got a bit flustered because that sounded like I was assuming he would be here.
But regardless, having said that, and as Ive already said, I do know I will see him soon. Either Thursday night at the pub to watch whoever the musos are, or Friday night for drinks with his work mates, or Saturday after the show.
Our "relationship" - Ill have to think of another word - has shifted slightly. It's a little more relaxed, or something. A bit like, for me at least, I'm confident now that I am his "other" woman and neither of us are finishing with each other any time soon.
I still feel a little self conscious at times though. A little shy. I don't think that's a bad thing. Its better than being too cocky and coming off brash. When he arrived I directed him straight to my bedroom, and went back and got him a drink of water that he wanted. He sat on my bed and drank it. "You finished?" I asked him with a bit of a laugh. "'Cause now I can kiss you!" I said and pushed him back on the bed.
The yummiest yummiest kisses!
I was dressed in my black chenille 3/4 dressing gown with nice lingerie... I undressed him, starting with his boots. He made this noise when I went to take his socks off, and I told him girls prefer the socks off! :-)
For the first time, there were a number of times, when he almost came quite early. But he made me stop, or be still, or let go of his balls. And Id pout, or say no, and then I started saying I wanted him to give it to me. "That makes a change, doesn't it?" he asked and I smiled.
"This feels so good he said". We looked at each other a lot this time... and he said "Its been a while." "6 weeks," I replied. "But who's counting?" We chuckled.
After a while though, it seemed things were going the other way... We tried a few different positions, and once, when I was on top, he said "we'll have to try something else." "Like what?" I asked. "What do you want" and he put his fingers on my mouth and said "Like last time." He wanted me to give him a head job. After a few minutes I went down on him, but I have to say this area of things is rather frustrating. Giving head, at least with my previous partner of 9 years, has never been a problem. But I know B likes it fast, and I told him I couldn't be that fast with my mouth. I came back up to ride him again, and kiss him. I asked him if he minded kissing after Id been down on him and he said not at all. Which I like.
He had me doggy style and after a couple of minutes he asked if I wanted to "finish" him. "Yes!" I said, and so he withdrew out of me and turned me around and I blew him with my mouth. I love when he comes; he felt hot and big in my mouth, tasted fantastic (the best Ive tasted), but most of all I like the noises he makes.
We laid for a few minutes but it actually felt odd. I'm used to him dressing or showering straight away.
As he was leaving, and we were kissing and cuddling, he said he wished he could stay. I wished he wouldn't say that, because that will never happen, but I just nodded and held on tighter.
I told him that next week there would be just him and me (ie: no kids) and that maybe he could make some noise. Then I got a bit flustered because that sounded like I was assuming he would be here.
But regardless, having said that, and as Ive already said, I do know I will see him soon. Either Thursday night at the pub to watch whoever the musos are, or Friday night for drinks with his work mates, or Saturday after the show.
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I received another text 2 days later asking if I was about but I was out for the day... then 2 days later I sent a simple text saying "thinkinboutcha" and he replied, equally simply, "likewise".
The next day I had some absolutely awful news; someone close to me passed away. B was due to play at a venue with his band that night and while I hadn't made plans to go watch anyway, there really was no way I could attend afterall. I sent a message anyway around 8pm wishing him luck and wishing I was there but I didn't receive a reply.
The next night he texted asking if I was up for a quick visit. I replied yes and gave him the details of my new place, but when he arrived I had to share the news from the day before with him and I knew because of the circumstances that I cant share here, that we wouldn't have sex, and quite understandably so. He was quite shocked by what Id told him and stayed about 1/2 hour...
Monday I sent a message asking if he was still going to rehearsals on a Wednesday now, or was that all finished now that they'd played the gig on Friday. Because they need a new singer, rehearsals are indeed not on for a while. B also asked how I was (because of the news Id shared) and I replied that Ive got great friends and family and I was doing okay which he said he was pleased to hear.
Tuesday I passed B in the car, and he smiled and waved... he was on his way home from work. 20 minutes later I noticed Id received an email from him which he would've sent an hour before, and he said that he checks his emails everyday, and that there's never anything from me and that he misses them every now and then. Awww. But I replied that Ive been trying to back off since he wanted to cool things a bit, and that I was glad he noticed. I told him its been hard because I still want him!
Thursday morning I messaged asking if he was going up to the local pub that night (to watch the band that was on; he'd played there the previous Thursday), and he said that for the first time in weeks he wouldn't be because he was looking after his sons but "maybe next week". We texted a little more...
And then yesterday, I attended the funeral, and wondered if in the evening B would message me about meeting him out for a drink... friends had just left my house around 6pm, when he messaged saying he would've loved for me to join him but that he was leaving soon... Anyway, long story short I was able to be at the pub within minutes, so I went. He had gone there straight from work and was there with a friend who Id apparently met before. B told me this guy knew "everything" which I clarified later; he knew about the passing of this person and also about the relationship between B and me.
B was lovely. he said he'd been thinking about me all week wondering if I was okay, and that he'd been affected by this news too and just wanted to give me a big hug. He said he had seen me walk in, and how hot I looked, and he especially liked my boots.
I only stayed a half hour, and as I left, he stood up too, and motioned me to him. He gave me a kiss and a big hug.
It made my day.
The next day I had some absolutely awful news; someone close to me passed away. B was due to play at a venue with his band that night and while I hadn't made plans to go watch anyway, there really was no way I could attend afterall. I sent a message anyway around 8pm wishing him luck and wishing I was there but I didn't receive a reply.
The next night he texted asking if I was up for a quick visit. I replied yes and gave him the details of my new place, but when he arrived I had to share the news from the day before with him and I knew because of the circumstances that I cant share here, that we wouldn't have sex, and quite understandably so. He was quite shocked by what Id told him and stayed about 1/2 hour...
Monday I sent a message asking if he was still going to rehearsals on a Wednesday now, or was that all finished now that they'd played the gig on Friday. Because they need a new singer, rehearsals are indeed not on for a while. B also asked how I was (because of the news Id shared) and I replied that Ive got great friends and family and I was doing okay which he said he was pleased to hear.
Tuesday I passed B in the car, and he smiled and waved... he was on his way home from work. 20 minutes later I noticed Id received an email from him which he would've sent an hour before, and he said that he checks his emails everyday, and that there's never anything from me and that he misses them every now and then. Awww. But I replied that Ive been trying to back off since he wanted to cool things a bit, and that I was glad he noticed. I told him its been hard because I still want him!
Thursday morning I messaged asking if he was going up to the local pub that night (to watch the band that was on; he'd played there the previous Thursday), and he said that for the first time in weeks he wouldn't be because he was looking after his sons but "maybe next week". We texted a little more...
And then yesterday, I attended the funeral, and wondered if in the evening B would message me about meeting him out for a drink... friends had just left my house around 6pm, when he messaged saying he would've loved for me to join him but that he was leaving soon... Anyway, long story short I was able to be at the pub within minutes, so I went. He had gone there straight from work and was there with a friend who Id apparently met before. B told me this guy knew "everything" which I clarified later; he knew about the passing of this person and also about the relationship between B and me.
B was lovely. he said he'd been thinking about me all week wondering if I was okay, and that he'd been affected by this news too and just wanted to give me a big hug. He said he had seen me walk in, and how hot I looked, and he especially liked my boots.
I only stayed a half hour, and as I left, he stood up too, and motioned me to him. He gave me a kiss and a big hug.
It made my day.
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