Another week.

Gone.

Today B texted me around 12.30pm to let me know he wouldnt be able to stop by tonight because he wasnt working. I said thanks for letting me know, and that I missed him last Sunday too. He said he didnt come by after work because it had been a big day and he was buggered.

Sigh.

Not much

Ive noticed that while my feelings have not changed - part of me does in fact love B, or at least loves what I know of him - Ive come to a kind of acceptance of things. I don't feel I have to drive past his house nearly so much. Often, to or from the gym, I drive a different way now. That's not to say I don't drive past, just not as much. :-) And texting or emailing him; I just don't do it as much. He knows I'm keen for him. And yes, I would like a bit more from him, but it just ain't gonna happen, so why stress myself?

Didn't think I would see B last night, because I figured he'd have to work today (he works Sunday mornings once a month). Didn't hear from him, and this morning, after I took my daughter to work, I did drive by and the Bat Mobile was not there.

But its 11.35am now, and I don't think Ill be hearing from him today to catch up either. :-(

Its another hot day, and I wouldn't blame him for just wanting to get home, and go for a swim.

We did a little texting at the beginning of the week; I asked him how his cold was, and he said fine. I told him I couldn't get the image of him in the mirror out of my head and his reply was "Yeah. Hilarious!".

I told him that I was no longer seeing the guy I was "kind of seeing", and when he asked who he was (he's a well known muso) I told him a little about him and he asked what happened. I replied "As you said, shit happens" (he said that once after the time he left early because we thought my daughter would be home any second and she didn't come home for something like an hour and a half!).

So, that's it for this week. Bleh.

57 days

B sms'd me just after 11pm Saturday night (last night), and said he was keen to see me, but had a bit of a cold. I said that was fine... I really didn't expect to see him, so I hadn't showered or anything. I knew I had about 45 minutes before he arrived, so off I went! :-)

He came about 12.30, and kissed me hello as he walked in. I smiled to myself as I noticed him try not to look at my cleavage in the dress I wore... He had to use my bathroom, so I got him a glass of water while he did that. When he returned, I handed him his drink, and I had one too. I put my glass down, as did he, and we reached for each other at the same time. I was so hungry to kiss him that my teeth caught his top lip. "Take it easy" he chuckled. We went at each other, there in my kitchen. Hot steamy kisses, and feeling each other.

All is right with my world when I'm there with him like that.

"Come with me" I said softly, as I lead him to my bedroom. I was wearing a dress that zipped from top to bottom at the front, and it was a very erotic sensation as he unzipped me.

I get very wet, when I'm turned on, and he knows that. Still, I had a hand towel ready, and I'd paused for a second to wipe some of the juices away. "What are you doing?" B asked. "You can feel how wet I am for you" I replied. "Leave it" he replied. "Don't worry," I said. "Theres plenty more". And there was.

We're kissing and feeling away, he's on his back on my bed, and I'm checking him out, and loving everything about him, and I remembered something; a funny quote thing Id read. So I told him, hoping he'd see the humour in it. "I'm not staking you. By the way, you're out of milk". He chuckled, but I'm not sure he really did find it that amusing. I asked him, "you dont really think I stalk you, do you?" "Well, I dont know" he replied. "I only drive by your place because its like a way of keeping connected with you. You must know by now I wouldn't do anything to get you in to trouble?" But all he said was "Yeh".

There was a time when I was on top, kind of across him, and I was moaning, and saying his name. He said something. A lengthy-ish sentence. But I was so caught up in feeling him, that I didn't actually hear what he said. I'm sure it was along the lines of "you feel so fucking amazing, especially when you say my name like that", but maybe he didn't? Maybe, because I was so hot, he said something like, "Babe, I don't think your deodorant is working and you need to move your arm?" Man, I wish Id asked him to repeat it. So, not that we talk a lot during sex, but when he did speak after that, I paid attention! :-)

It was a humid night, and I got up to turn the ceiling fan on...

We're never in one position, and this time we even tried doing it standing up, face to face. It felt wonderful, but his dick is not very big, and we didn't stay in that position long because he kept slipping out.

I did wonder if perhaps I should offer a condom to him, based on his last few times he requested it (except for the 2 hour marathon in the car), but I didn't. Not even when he asked me "You're still on the pill, right??" and I answered "Of course." Which I am.

He took me from behind, which is a fav position of mine, and we were that way for a while. I have big mirrored sliding doors beside my bed, and always have dimmed lighting, and so I was watching us for a lot of it. I loved watching him pump in to me. His dick actually looked bigger this way. I love the whole size of him, compared to my slenderness. I love watching him watch us too.

And he came on my back. Guess he just wanted to make sure regarding the whole pill/condom thing.

It was only 1.30am, but he left straight away. I always want to cry when he leaves, but instead remain touchy feely and upbeat, and smile.

So, 57 days since that last time we had sex. I sat on my verandah in the cool of the night, and watched him drive away...

Win

I sent B a text asking him to give me a call because I wanted to tell him about something Id won (which I cant write about here; too many revealing details!). But he knows I'm a bit lucky that way; Ive won a few things although this particular prize is very major should I win (I just got through to the final stage). So, he did ring a few hours later, and we had a nice chat. He was possibly going interstate with his work for the weekend to help out with a job, which was good timing for him, considering he didn't have to start back at his other regular night job til the following week. So that was on the Thursday when we talked...

The following Tuesday, I texted him asking if he had to do the job interstate. You know, as a way to start off dialogue. He replied asking how I was and that no, he didn't get to go unfortunately (I'm sure he would've loved the money). "Apart from missing you" I replied, "I'm fab". I talked a little about the weather (its been ridiculously hot!) and asked if his friend L was still married. And I asked what the chances were that I would see him the weekend coming (since he returned to night work). He acknowledged it was fucking hot. And that yes L was still married. "And yes you're good at avoiding the big q's :-)" I wrote back. "Yeah maybe" he replied...